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Father Time….

When I was little, I never thought about my grandparent’s getting older, I just assumed they would be around forever. I remember looking at my grandma’s senior picture and thinking she looked like a movie star. I would imagine her in an old black and white t.v. show dancing with Fred Astaire.  I was her first granddaughter….she did anything for me (yes, I was spoiled).  Some of my best memories as a child were being at my grandma’s house. She would make me the best grilled ham and cheese sandwiches…and to this day, I still can’t seem to make one like she did. She hugged me, loved me, and watched me grow…all the while, she was growing older too. 
(wasn’t she stunning?)

me sitting on my grandma’s lap at seaworld
me sporting some braces while loving on my grandma
When I was in fifth grade, my grandpa passed away, and it changed all of our lives. My grandma got her license (yep, you read that right, she never drove until after he passed away). I’ll never forget the little white car she drove….very slowly (she was the classic old lady driver stereotype). Later, when she was diagnosed with Parkinson’s, her life (and my family’s) took another turn. Her hand started to shake, her fork would clink against her plate, her head started to bobble from side to side…it was hard for me to watch her not be able to control her movements. She would get frustrated at herself. Of course, as only family can, I would joke around with her and say she should work at a lemonade shakeup stand.

my grandma supporting me at a pageant….I was robbed of first place by the way, haaa

Time has a way of moving on whether we are ready for it or not.  It seemed like one day my grandma was living in her home, able to take care of herself, then the next moment she was moving in with my parents because it wasn’t safe for her to be alone. It was hard for her to say goodbye to her home, but she did it. My parent’s moved their bedroom upstairs and made my grandma a nice little living area….her new home. This past year, she was diagnosed with ovarian cancer. Because of her age, we didn’t think she would (or should) do chemo, but the doctor said if she didn’t, she would have other complications that would be painful and ultimately lead to her death.  She did several rounds of chemo. She lost her hair. She looks so fragile.  During the last few weeks, I’ve had to take care of my grandma in ways that I never thought I would have to. I don’t want to remember my grandma like this….I want to remember the strong woman that took care of me, that held me on her lap and sang me to sleep…but I know, I will look back and cherish these times, even though they are hard.

my grandma resting in her chair
a picture of my grandpa that sits on her dresser…
Her wig. It’s itchy, so she usually just wears a little beanie
Her precious moments that she has collected since I was a little girl…I’m pretty sure she has almost every one ever made….ever, seriously…ever, lol
Her hair is starting to grow back now….
Her holding my baby girl (on the left) and my niece….and showing off her beanie. 
I love you grandma, you mean the world to me and you will never know how much you have impacted my life. You took care of me and now, I will take care of you. You will always be my mimi….

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